Sunday mornings
before too many people
are up and about
I escape into the quiet
lonely places
of my surrounding suburbs
places once so foreign
to someone like me
from some other part of town
but for seven years
they’ve been home
we breathe together
these streets and I.

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was it real?
i stood above the other faces
words fell from my mouth
i forgot more than half
of the things that i wanted to say
and fumbled with the microphone
later on, someone asked
“have you given the speech yet?”
“yes,
i have.”

the night blazed on
faces came and went
it was over
before I felt I had a grip
on things

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Dream (last Saturday morning): I hop into a car with…somebody (not sure who). He’s driving. We seem to be leaving from my parents’ house, and he’s driving rather quickly, not stopping as we cross the intersections. When we reach Springvale Rd, he turns right without stopping. We go too wide, and miss the road. We miss the service lane, too. “So this is it,” I think, “we’re crashing”, and let my body relax as we head straight for a house. Inexplicably, we come through the other side and stop. I get out, appear to be ok (somehow) and figure I should call someone. I try calling 000, and explain there’s been a car crash, but they tell me I should call the police. “oh. Sorry to bother you. I’ll try them.” I struggle to dredge the number from my memory, and in the end I’m not sure if they answer or not. I leave the destroyed house behind and keep wandering through the suburban streets, dazed and confused.

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you can let go

if you want to
into the sea
the sky
the clouds
the cool wind on your face
and the feeling as if
anything can happen

but you can’t let go
right now
can you?

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last night i dreamt about technology.
it was rather disappointing when i awoke;
i wanted my dreams to be about
other things.

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some days
it’s all you can do
to hold back.

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she was surprised at the number of people
who come to watch the aircraft pass by
there were even
two ice cream trucks
one (at least) with a small Turkish flag
poking out of a corner.

some stayed for just a minute
one take-off was enough for them
but others stayed longer
i shot most of a roll of film
standing up near the road
holding the shutter release cable
trying to guess the right moment
as the plane passed over the street light
on its way into the beyond.

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dream: i was lying on the floor
waiting for the world
to stop turning
when i looked through
the golden shagpile carpet
my parents once had
and spied a green spiralled telephone cord
running along the sideboard
and at that very moment
i knew
i wasn’t where i thought i was.

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i left something behind
in another suburb
and had to retrieve it
in the harsh sunlight
of the next day.

it’s a street I once knew well
and spent much time either on
or travelling through it
unlike other nearby places
i’d be happy to return
every once in a while.

i wandered nearby side-streets
looking for something new
something unseen
i let memories reappear
triumphs and disappointments
and a very old photo
of nothing in particular
that i’d taken with a co-worker’s
digital camera
back when such things
were still somewhat novel.

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hit the road
just for a little while
let the suburbs whip by
until you’re in the shire
of somewhere or other
staring at an expanse of water
surrounded by man-made walls
and kangaroo droppings

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